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Not your grandmother’s etiquette

Hello and welcome to the Clise Etiquette blog, a place to discuss savvy and not so savvy decorum. Etiquette may sound like a stuffy or old fashioned topic, but it’s really just about making yourself and others more comfortable and successful by being respectful, kind and professional.

I am an etiquette consultant, speaker, trainer, coach and author of Spinach in Your Boss’s Teeth: Essential Etiquette for Professional Success. I share etiquette and protocol tips, stories and techniques that you can use to feel more confident, at ease and successful in the workplace and socially.

I invite you to share your thoughts and questions on the situations in life that confuse you, anger you, give you pause or make you proud. Please feel free to let me know if there are topics you’d like me to discuss or hear more about. Some of my best posts come from questions or stories readers share with me.

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The year of kindness: Join me on a kindness journey

Kindness is showing love to someone else. I believe that kindness is the cure for violence and hatred around the world.

Lady Gaga

The January 1st Parade magazine edition had an article about making 2017 the year of being kind and included the lovely quote above by Lady Gaga. According to the article, studies have shown that being kind has many benefits not only for the receiver but the giver as well. When you are kind to others it lights up your brain’s reward center. Hospital patients who are treated with kindness and compassion have less pain, anxiety and shorter hospital visits. And conversely, kind doctors are less tired and are more engaged. Neighbors who are social and help each other have tighter knit neighborhoods and are less isolated. Kids who exhibit emotional intelligence, which includes kindness, are shown to have more success in life. Continue reading “The year of kindness: Join me on a kindness journey” »

Online Etiquette: Make Sure Your Child Knows What It Means to be a Cyber Bully

Contribution from Jenny Holt, a freelance writer for several health magazines.

Gone are the days of a single school bully extorting lunch money in the schoolyard. Bullying is no longer confined to school or even physical interactions. Kids have constant access to technology, which has also become a new playground for bullies. Continue reading “Online Etiquette: Make Sure Your Child Knows What It Means to be a Cyber Bully” »

Don’t ask these 8 questions: Conversation dos and don’ts

“Where do you live?” I asked the man sitting at the table at which I was seated. He stated a neighborhood I hadn’t heard of so I said, “Oh, I’ve never heard of that neighborhood. Where is that?” As he revealed where he lived and the entire table listened I realized it was the wrong question to ask. He was obviously embarrassed by the neighborhood he lives in. The event I was attending as the speaker was held at an upscale Seattle club where one’s address is very important. I should have realized this when I asked that seemingly innocuous question. Further proof that this etiquette consultant is not perfect. Continue reading “Don’t ask these 8 questions: Conversation dos and don’ts” »

Going up, going down, going round & round: Elevator, escalator and revolving door etiquette

revolving_doorMy friend got into the revolving door of his office building and was moving forward when, bam, the door suddenly stopped. He hit the glass front with his head and his glasses cut his face. What the heck just happened my friend wondered? Turns out a young man had jumped into the same compartment as my friend and caught his foot on the door causing it to stop suddenly. My friend, in a moment of frustration, sternly stated to the young man, “It’s really not that hard – one person to a compartment!” Continue reading “Going up, going down, going round & round: Elevator, escalator and revolving door etiquette” »

Thanksgiving (and other meals) dos and don’ts

turkeyCan you hear it? It’s the sound of busy hosts shopping, prepping and cooking Thanksgiving dinner. I’m thankful my sister is one of those hosts. She usually hosts Thanksgiving because she has the bigger house and bigger family. The rest of us get to enjoy the gourmet bounty and family gathering in exchange for bringing a dish or two. Lucky us.

Whether you’re hosting or attending the Thanksgiving gathering this year you may be challenged by a few etiquette dilemmas. Let me answer some of the common etiquette dilemmas that apply especially to the holidays but that are also useful for other gatherings. Continue reading “Thanksgiving (and other meals) dos and don’ts” »

Little niceties that make a big difference

holding-door-openEtiquette has some specific rules that help you know what to do and not do, such as which fork to use on a crowded table or that it’s not okay to cut in line when a queue has formed. But, there are a lot of little niceties that fall under manners that are sometimes less known and are more subtle.

Continue reading “Little niceties that make a big difference” »

What not to say or do when your coworker is sick or grieving

Image result for welcome back

Illness and loss can be hard topics to discuss. Most people simply don’t know what to say or do when someone they know has been diagnosed with a serious illness or loses a spouse or child. It seems extra hard when that someone is an employee or coworker. When personal matters intertwine with work we often don’t know how to handle it. Continue reading “What not to say or do when your coworker is sick or grieving” »

Smile, you’re on camera! Video conference dos and don’ts

video-conferenceHave you ever had a conversation with someone on the phone and wondered about the meaning of their words? If so, it’s possible the lack of body language made the conversation difficult to interpret. According to research conducted by Professor Albert Mehrabian, when we communicate feelings and attitudes, 7% of the meaning is contained in the words we use. 38% of the meaning comes from the way words are used – tone, volume, speed, etc. And facial expressions convey 55% of the meaning. Therefore, a conference call or phone meeting can lead to some miscommunication due to the lack of body language. Because of this and other reasons, many companies are converting to video conferencing technology for meetings to increase understanding, reduce travel expenses and increase productivity.

Continue reading “Smile, you’re on camera! Video conference dos and don’ts” »